Money Management

What are Your Money Messages?

money messages

Do you know what your money messages are?

Do you think you are a failure with money?

Are you afraid to talk to people about money?

What do you say to yourself about money?

Are you avoiding your money altogether?

There is a reason that money is the new "taboo" subject and that it is easier to talk about sex then money. It's because of the messages in society and in your own life.

Let's first revisit what they are (see the Truth Behind Your Finances page) Money messages are those feelings that you get around money. They are the words that your little voice in your head says to you. They could be positive or negative. They come from past experiences, past and present relationships, things that you have heard or seen. The messages are the rules that you have been playing your game by.

Some examples that you may or may not relate to include:

“I feel stupid and embarrassed by how I deal with money!”
“I won’t be happy unless I make X amount of money this year!”
“Money doesn’t grow on trees!”
“I avoid going to the mailbox because then I don’t have to see the bills!”
“I won’t talk to my mother about money because she will be disappointed in me.”
“I’m hopeless with money”
“I work hard – I deserve to buy myself nice things”
“I won’t spend money – it’s a waste”
“I feel guilty when I spend money”
“My kids think I am a tightwad and a cheapskate”
“How did my credit card bill get to be that much?
“My spouse will kill me if they know I bought this!”
“I don’t have to worry about money – that’s my spouse’s job!”

As a human being you are programmed to survive. So when you had these past experiences, you would react to them in a way to make sure that you survived. Your Money Management brain then remembers them, files away that reaction and uses it again if you come face to face with a similar situation. After all it worked in the past for you so why wouldn’t it work in the future.

The reality is that these money messages are based on reactions to different situations then you may face today. So in the past you may have told yourself you aren’t smart enough to manage money – but in reality – today (and most likely then) you are smart enough (especially as managing money is easy – the “managing money is hard” is a money message too).

Money Messages Exercises

If you aren’t sure what your money messages are then there are 2 exercises you can do.

Exercise 1

Download and print the exercise from the Personal Finance Tools Page. and answer the questions truthfully and carefully.

Exercise 2

Over the course of a day or two, pause before you spend money. Don’t stop yourself from spending money, just take a moment and think about what comes up for you before you buy that coffee at the drive thru, or you buy lunch with your coworkers; When you can, write it down.

Do you think that if you spend that $5.00 on a coffee and croissant that you won’t have enough to pay for gas on the way home? If you buy that $40.00 book, your wife will kill you? The price of gas is going up so fast that you don’t think you can keep driving so far to work every day and you’ll have to find a new job? Are you making up stories, making excuses, justifying your purchase? Do you think to yourself “I work hard I deserve this?

Once you identify your money messages, you become aware of them. You can see where, and maybe even why, you let them control your money and your life. You want to look at each message carefully and use the power of choice to choose if you want to keep that message or not. It takes practice but it is worth it in the end. Once you no longer let that little voice rule your decisions, you have power to make a change in your life!

Onto Step 4 - What is your Dream? Now you don't have your money messages holding you back, you can dream about what you want for your future!

Return to Step 3 - Where are you Now? - Organize Finances

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